Orgy for One is the third track on Ninja Sex Party's sixth album, Cool Patrol. Its music video was released on March 6th, 2018. The song features a guitar solo and guest appearance from Panic! At The Disco's ex-touring guitarist Kenneth (Kenny) Harris.


Ninja Brian, I invited a large number of girls over here for an orgy tonight, but I have to say the responses thus far haven't been exactly what I hoped for.

Stacey had a headache, Jenny was in jail

Brenda had to work late, Kate was getting Jenny's bail

Angela got scurvy, Ashley caught a cold

Sally's dad exploded, that's what I was told

Michelle had to play checkers, Anne was baking pies

Wendy's dad exploded too, that might have been a lie

Pam had frisbee lessons, Stella had ballet

Now I'm by myself, but I can have fun anyway

So dim (dim) the lights (the lights)

Remove (remove) my tights, yeah

Nobody showed, but I'm gonna have some fun

Let's get this party started, it's an orgy for one

It's me and my hand, and it's hotter than the sun

So break out the tissues, it's an orgy for one

I'm working out my issues in an orgy for one

Margaret's cat was nauseous, Jean was way too shy

Steve was not invited because he was a guy

Claire was parasailing, Brook said she was in space

But it doesn't matter 'cuz I'm rounding second base

All through (through) the night (the night)

My grasp (my grasp) is tight

Beating so hard you'd think I was a drum

And I don't even care, it's an orgy for one

I'm here all alone and I'm tugging on my plums

It's not just masturbation, it's an orgy for one

It's a fucking celebration, it's an orgy for one

Orgy for one (orgy for one)

Orgy for one

Six- (six-) -tynine (-tynine)

Without (without) the nine (the nine)

Now pour (pour) the wine (the wine)

I'm mine (I'm mine), all mine

I'm batting a thousand and nailing everyone

Thank you, everybody at this orgy for one

These pillows are stacked to look vaguely like a butt

You know I'm going for it, it's an orgy for one

My junk is getting sore and it's an orgy for one

You know that I'll be scoring at the orgy for one

Orgy for one (orgy for one)

Orgy for one

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